According to Merriam-Webster here’s something to absorb:
Definition of review
(Entry 1 of 2)1a: a formal military inspectionb: a military ceremony honoring a person or an event2: REVISION sense 1a3: a general survey (as of the events of a period)4: an act or the process of reviewing5: judicial reexamination (as of the proceedings of a lower tribunal by a higher)6a: a critical evaluation (as of a book or play)b: a magazine devoted chiefly to reviews and essays
It goes on further to talk about self-evaluative things but for our intentions we’ll just stick with this very clear definition, particularly the part about books which says “a CRITICAL EVALUATION“. This little gem implies some kind of professional discussion and maybe a bit of expertise, doesn’t it? What it does NOT say is “here’s where you get to just be nasty because something was not to your particular taste” or how about “here’s where you can take a few shots at someone not based on the merit of the product or service but on the fact that you’re mad at them for some other reason”.
I was in Costco the other day and discovered that they’ve started doing samples of food again (YAY!!!). I love to sample new things so when offered a little morsel I gladly accepted it. Now I am not going to tell you what the product was but I will tell you that I didn’t like it at all, yuck! I would have spat it out but, to be very honest, I would never want to shame the sampler like that, it’s just unkind to be so obviously insulting when they are just there doing their thing. I chewed (sort of, it was really mushy) and I (reluctantly) swallowed and quietly & KINDLY said to the sampler (who was grinning excitedly and waiting for my response), “I’m just not sure this is for me”. That was enough to make her look at me like we were back in grade 1 and I had stolen her milk money.
This past weekend I went on a mini-road-trip with my 88-year-old dad who wanted to go visit an old pal of his. We stayed in an expensive hotel overlooking a beautiful harbor with constant entertainment like sea-life, sea-planes, sea-taxis, ferries, birds, people walking dogs, you name it – fantastic viewing! The food in the hotel was very pricey but delicious and exquisitely presented. The rooms were so comfortable with lovely furnishings and an excess of cushy pillows. The staff members were all very professional, super nice and tried to be really helpful but, having had 14 years experience as an owner of a hospitality-food-beverage-accommodation business, I could plainly see that the owners (or maybe managers) had hung the staff out in the breeze to flail as best they could with the shocking cuts in service or amenities they were now providing for these very high prices.
For example, there is no daily service to your room – if you need a towel, or another washcloth, or another little coffee package for the little coffee machine you now have to call and ask. Then, they will deliver it to your door only with a knock. Nobody, during your stay, will pop into your room to tidy up your bed or clean the mirror because you have sloppy tooth-brushing skills. There was no soap. We called and they brought us soap but WE HAD TO CALL AND ASK FOR SOAP. There was not one sheet of paper in the room with a list of hotel amenities (I want to know where the gym is!), so later, when down at the desk I asked them why there was no info and the manager gave me some blah-blah about how they are transitioning to QR codes. Well that’s nice but I still can’t find the f-ing gym. And does everyone really have QR-reading skills? I can tell you right now that there was one person in my party who does not. Here’s the really funny one: Due to covid, they will absolutely not enter your room but you are not allowed to park your own car. Strange hey? They wont come in you room but they will get into your car, that very small space that you’ve been breathing in and out in all day…? So now you have to give them your keys and they park your car and when you need your car again you have to call and give them 10-15 minutes notice. The day before we left were going to dinner with my dad’s buddy’s family so I called for my car and we went down after 10-15 minutes to head out. Somehow, they got my car to the front of the hotel and then lost the key. I have one of those keyless-keys so to replace it, in another city, was going to be an expensive and time-consuming challenge and I was quickly becoming impatient and irritated. After some time they did find my car key but we were late and fair-to-say fully pissed off by then. I took my key back (no tip that time I’m afraid) and did not give it to them again. I parked my own car in their parkade when we returned that night and went to retrieve it myself when we checked out the next morning.
Here’s where I might be getting to my point… I had sort of decided that I would review the hotel and cut them short on the service but after really thinking about it who would that really help? It certainly wouldn’t help the staff who were “the service” and obviously working very long hours and maybe hadn’t received all the training or resources that they absolutely should have. Literally, they are doing the best they can and how badly would I feel if any of them were held accountable for problems they did not create. A bashing-review wouldn’t help me either because I already know that I probably wont stay there again and slamming them wont make me feel any better about anything. It wouldn’t help the owners or managers because I know the type – the bottom line is the only thing that matters and being in such a lovely spot in a real tourist location, yah, they wont have any problems filling the rooms. I decided, instead, that I would write a letter to the hotel manager and relay my thoughts privately, professionally and without venom or malice. Because I feel like I kind of am qualified to make a CRITICAL EVALUATION then perhaps that’s what would be appropriate. I also recognize that maybe I’m just more particular about room-servicing than others and that my concerns were maybe a little more amplified than they might be with others.
As for the food I sampled in Costco, it’s the same thing isn’t it? I thought it was gross but someone else might be like “OMG, that’s the best thing I ever put in my mouth and I’ll talke 3 boxes please!” It would not be fair for me to go on either the food product’s or Costco’s website and give them a bad review for trying to make me barf because really, what could be more subjective than olfactory taste? I didn’t like it (at all lol) but that doesn’t actually mean that it’s BAD so I have no right to say that it is.
I’ve been the subject of reviews for many, many years. With the Lodge I had hundreds; google, airbnb, website, trivago, a host of local sites and, of course a VERY few personal emails. Following my life at the Lodge I’m now subject to reviews again – I’m now getting reviews on my book (which has a whole chapter on reviews!). I read them all, as I did at the Lodge, and sometimes I smile, sometimes I cringe but after almost every one I have to say to myself “that’s not a review, it’s just an opinion”.
Shortly after my book launch I received a really nasty review, a fella who went on and on about what an awful person I am for exposing these these stories, for being so mean and it’s a crappy book… and I tell ya, it made my jaw drop and my stomach tighten! It was written so subjectively that it became immediately clear to me that this person had an agenda and it was not CRITICAL EVALUATION at all, it was designed to punish and nothing more. Then I looked at his name, then I looked at his profile picture and then I burst out laughing because he was one of my guests and his is one of the stories I tell in my book!
Everyone with an internet connection thinks they are a master-reviewer and that their personal opinions have a right to exist alongside real reviews for all of eternity on our beloved web. To that end, it seems that some are more prone to just share a bit of their bad mood on that lucky day. Don’t get me wrong here; it’s not that I don’t believe in reviews, I just think that many of the “reviews” we see aren’t actually out there for the intended purpose of a review, which goes back to (you guessed it!) CRITICAL EVALUATION. It’s just a book folks, and it’s meant for a bit of enlightening entertainment and a bit of industry-gossip and a bit of a good belly-laugh (I hope).
Well, I guess if there’s one final point to make it’s that I’d like you to be careful with the reviews you leave for people, products & services; make sure they are critical evaluations and not emotional and subjective punitive measures. Finally, before you hit that “enter” button really ask yourself if Merriam and Webster would shake a finger at you for what you’re about to do.
As ever, I’m grateful you stopped by! I always welcome comments and suggestions and look forward to sharing more thoughts with you! Be cool and be kind,
s.